San Francisco, Calif., Mar 26, 2017 / 04:02 pm (CNA/EWTN News).- In 2013, Beyonce Knowles topped GQ’s list of “The 100 Hottest Women of the 21st Century.”
That same year, the “definitive men’s magazine” that promises “sexy women” along with style advice, entertainment news and more ran a shorter listicle: “10 Reasons Why You Should Quit Watching Porn.”
The list included reasons such as decreased sexual impotence in men that regularly viewed pornography, and a reported lack of control of sexual desires. It was inspired by an interview with NoFap, an online community of people dedicated to holding each other accountable in abstaining from pornography and masturbation.The site clearly states that it is decidedly non-religious.
Matt Fradd, on the other hand, is a Catholic. Fradd has spent much of his adult life urging people to quit pornography, and developing websites and resources to help pornography addicts.
But even though he’s Catholic, Fradd’s new anti-porn book, “The Porn Myth,” won’t quote the saints or the Bible or recommend a regimen of rosaries.
“I wanted to write a non-religious response to pro-pornography arguments,” Fradd said.
That’s not because he’s abandoned his beliefs, or thinks that faith has nothing to say about pornography.
“Whenever I get up to speak, people expect that I’m just going to use a bunch of moral arguments (against porn). And I have them, and I’m happy to use them, and I think ultimately that’s what we need to get to. But I think using science…is always the best way to introduce this issue to people.”
“In an increasingly secular culture, we need arguments based on scientific research, of which there’s been much,” he said. It’s why he cites numerous studies on each page of his book, and why he’s included 50 pages of additional appendixes citing additional research.
Fradd is careful to clarify in his book that it is not a book against sex or sexuality. What he does want to do is challenge the way many people have come to think about pornography, and question whether it leads to human flourishing.
“This book rests on one fundamental presupposition: if you want something to flourish, you need to use it in accordance with its nature,” Fradd wrote. “Don’t plant tomatoes in a dark closet and water them with soda and expect to have vibrant tomato plants. To do so would be to act contrary to the nature of tomatoes. Similarly, don’t rip sex out of its obvious relational context, turn it into a commodity, and then expect individuals, families and society to flourish.”
But why dedicate a whole book to the scientific effects of pornography?
Fradd said that the sheer volume of pornography consumption makes this an especially urgent book – and it’s at least two decades too late. According to one survey, about 63 percent of men and 21 percent of women ages 18-30 have reported that they view pornography several times a week – not to mention those viewing it slightly less often.
“If we have an iPhone we have a portable X-rated movie theater. And some studies suggest children as young as 8 are being exposed to it, so if I meet someone who’s 14, I know that they have looked at porn or are looking at it regularly,” Fradd said.
Fradd recalls in his book a study done by Melissa Farley, director of Prostitution Research and Education. When Farley’s team set out to do a study about men who buy sex, they had a difficult time finding men who don’t do so.
“The use of pornography, phone sex, lapdances, and other services has become so widespread that Farley’s team had to loosen their definition of a non-sex buyer in order to assemble a hundred-person control group for their research,” Fradd wrote.
Throughout the book, Fradd uses scientific research to debunk numerous and prevailing “myths” or arguments about pornography, including the ideas that pornography empowers women, that it isn’t addictive, and that it’s a healthy part of sexuality and relationships.
One of the most commonly believed myths is that pornography doesn’t hurt anyone, Fradd said. But he has found that pornography harms people personally, relationally, and societally.
On the personal level, a 2014 study from the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Berlin found that frequent pornography use in men was associated with decreased brain matter in certain areas of the brain.
The abstract explained that the association may not be causation, but correlation, “which means that if porn isn’t shrinking your brain, it would mean that people with small brains like porn more,” Fradd said.
“It’s not a feather in your cap, either way.”
As for whether or not pornography empowers women, Fradd said that while he agrees that a woman who consents to producing pornography is in some sense “better” than a woman who is forced or coerced, but not by much, because pornography is still being used by the consumer to treat another person as a means to an end.
“No matter the level of consent, it is a manly thing to treat a woman who has forgotten her dignity with dignity nonetheless,” Fradd wrote.
Fradd also quotes Rebecca Whisnant, a feminist theory professor, who once refuted the myth of porn as female empowerment in a talk:
“Feminism is about ending the subordination of women. Expanding women’s freedom of choice on a variety of fronts is an important part of that, but it is not the whole story. In fact, any meaningful liberation movement involves not only claiming the right to make choices, but also holding oneself accountable for the effects of those choices on oneself and on others,” she said in a 2007 talk.
These women are also perpetuating a system that robs women, as a group, of empowerment, Fradd said, such as women who are sex trafficked while participating in the porn industry. By some estimates, two million women and girls are held in sexual slavery at any given time.
It’s part of the reason why Fradd is donating all of the proceeds of “The Porn Myth” to Children of the Immaculate Heart, a non-profit corporation operating in San Diego, Calif, whose mission is to serve survivors of human trafficking.
Porn also disempowers the women whose relationships are destroyed by men caught up in pornography addictions, Fradd noted.
“Ask the millions of women whose husbands habitually turn to porn. Do these women feel empowered by pornography?” Fradd asked.
Pornography use in marriage is one way that porn harms relationships. According to Fradd’s research, a survey of 350 divorce lawyers reported in 2003 that pornography was at least part of the problem in half of all divorce cases they saw.
Another commonly believed myth is that marriage will solve a porn addiction, which shows a misunderstanding of the psychology of addiction in the first place, Fradd explains.
But pornography can also damage the relationships of a single person looking for love.
A 2011 TED talk by psychologist Philip Zimbardo said that studies showed a “widespread fear of intimacy and social awkwardness among men,” and an inability to engage in face-to-face conversations with women, Fradd wrote.
“Why? Zimbardo says this is caused by disproportionate Internet use in general and excessive new access to pornography in particular. ‘Boys’ brains are being digitally rewired in a totally new way, for change, novelty, excitement.’”
And Zimbardo is not alone in his observations. As Fradd notes, neuroscientist William Struthers wrote in 2009 that “With repeated sexual acting out in the absence of a partner, a man will be bound and attached to the image and not a person.”
In other words, men can start preferring pixels to people. According to NoFap’s statistics in 2013, about half of their users had never had sex with a real person, meaning their only experience of sexual intimacy has been digital.
That reason alone has been why many people, men especially, have sought to kick their porn habits, Fradd said.
“I know agnostics or atheists who quit porn literally because they couldn’t have sex with people they were hooking up with. That’s why they quit porn. And these guys are fit, good-looking young men, who couldn’t get an erection around a young woman. But they realized if the woman left and they opened up their laptop they’d get an immediate erection.”
Studies have also shown that pornography addiction is driven by the increase in amounts, and varieties, of material readily available to anyone with access to the internet.
“People find themselves viewing more and more disturbing pornography, and the reason for this is because of a decrease in dopamine in the brain, which happens because of the addiction one has, and they end up seeking out more graphic, violent forms of pornogrpahy just to boost the dopamine enough to feel normal,” Fradd said.
“People don’t wake up when they’re 30 and decide to look at child porn or feces porn or something disgusting like that. These are big things that people spiral into, and the industry has to keep pushing the envelope because it’s addictive,” he added.
While the statistics of pornography can be disturbing and depressing, Fradd stressed that there was still hope. He devotes several chapters in the book to protecting children from pornography, dealing with pornograpy in marriage, and getting help for those addicted to pornography.
Fradd himself has spent years in ministry to those with pornography addictions, and helps run the site Integrity Restored, which offers numerous resources to help those struggling with addictions and those in ministry to them.
The most effective steps for someone to follow for someone addicted to porn?
“They should find a spiritual director, they should go to therapy, and they should find a 12 step group (like Sexaholics Anonymous),” Fradd said. “With those three things together, we’ve seen the most success.”
Often well-meaning Christians will relegate pornography addictions to the spiritual realm, telling people that they simply need to pray more, Fradd said. And while prayer isn’t a bad thing, it doesn’t address the psychological aspect of addiction.
“When people do things like put a picture of Mary on their laptop or pray more, it doesn’t actually usually work. It’s not a solely spiritual problem, so what we don’t need is a solely spiritual answer,” he said.
Just as you should encourage a clinically depressed person to seek counseling and therapy, you should also encourage someone experiencing addiction to seek professional help, he added.
Fradd said he’s also been encouraged by the number of celebrities who have recently spoken out against pornography, such as Pamela Anderson, British comedian Russell Brand, actors Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Rashida Jones, and former NFL player and “Brooklyn Nine-Nine” actor Terry Crews, to name a few.
Slowly, he said, society is catching up to the science that shows how harmful pornography can be.
“We’ve reached a tipping point in our culture such that everyone either struggles with porn and/or knows someone who does, and we all see the negative effects,” he said.
“So the porn industry’s cronies can tell us that pornography is healthy for well-rounded adults, but they now sound like the tobacco apologists sounded like in the 80s. In light of the evidence, their assertions seem increasingly ridiculous.”
Fradd’s book is available at: https://www.thepornmyth.com/
[…]
One less katholic mortification to shoulder…how many more to go?
Shocking! Who could have possibly seen this coming? Maybe Kamala will pick Michelle Obama as a VP, get 8, then Michelle can get 8. That would be 30 years for the Obama’s controlling the White House. Not too shabby…
They might do better with Michelle at the top of the ticket! Whatever the outcome this election will probably be a loss for Christians and democracy.
I would love to see how much communication goes from the administration of the 46th President to the 44th President. It’s not like Obama never evaded the restrictions of his authority before (DACA, etc) before, so why should the 22nd Amendment get in the way?
It’s sayonara time for the meat puppet! Joe Robinette Biden has FINALLY bit the dust; and he won’t be back and he WON”T be missed. Ain’t it amazing? That Biden lasted as long as he did with all the baggage he carried was truly astounding. Reputed to be a serial plagiarist by some pundits and the United State’s most mediocre politician extant by other pundits plus his well-earned reputation as a many-times-over incredible liar-in-chief by many others seem to have done him in. And then his cultivated (by him) reputation as a “Devoted Catholic;” woe, that’s one for the books! Especially that meme about how much he did to deliver the goods for women who desired “healthcare” while Biden worked OVERTIME to legalize abortion for all the pregnant women. GOOD RIDDANCE to Joe B. Now bring in Kamala; Can’t wait for the verbal bloodshed about to ensue @ the hands of Donald J. Trump.God bless all.- RITE_TURN ROGER
I say adios to the weak president. He needs much consoling from us Catholics. After nearly 5 decades in the congress and higher office later he had his time. Hopefully he will now have the time to reflect on his abortion stance wth counceling from his Cardinal.
You say “his well-earned reputation as a many-times-over incredible liar-in-chief by many others seem to have done him in”. That is seriously out of reality. Trump has the corner of prolific liars. We Catholic politicals seem to cast HATE on anyone in opposition when in decline. Remember, some day we ALL will face our creator.
“Trump has the corner of prolific liars.”
From what you’ve said in other comments, you are in your 70s (or older?). Were you around in the 1970s, ’80s, ’90s, etc.? Biden’s lying, plagiarizing, bullying, and related actions are possibly unequaled in terms of batty craziness and sheer quantity. Anyone who paid attention to his 1988 presidential campaign, or the Bork hearings, or the Thomas hearings, knows that his relationship with truth is somewhere in the “seventh cousin twice removed” category. You can start here for lists of a few hundred of Biden’s lies.
Ok, can reply now. I am not going to defend Biden. I will give some critical lies of major consequence by each.
Factcheck, Associated Press and Forbes:
Biden: he seems to issue exaggerations and embellishments rather than outright lies. “Maybe”.
TRUMP: President Donald Trump told 30,573 false or misleading statements over 4 years. Based on this number, he is clearly a prolific liar.
Trump said there were a small number of “PROPLE” at the Capitol on 1/6. That’s false. The attack on the U.S. Capitol was the deadliest assault on the seat of American power in over 200 years. As thoroughly documented by video, photographs and people who were there, thousands of people descended on Capitol Hill in what became a brutal scene of hand-to-hand combat with police. (also, Trump said “I am your retribution, I will pardon the convicted hostages”.
Trump Charlottesville: After the deadly white nationalist rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, in 2017: “I think there are fine people on both sides.”
MILITARY DEATHS
BIDEN: “The truth is, I’m the only president this century that doesn’t have any — this decade — any troops dying anywhere in the world like he did.” FALSE. At least 16 service members have been killed in hostile action since Biden took office in January 2021. On Aug. 26, 2021, 13 died during a suicide bombing at Hamid Karzai International Airport in Kabul, Afghanistan.
COVID
Science America:
Trump: More than 400,000 Americans died of COVID-19 under Trump’s watch. I don’t remember hearing that number, but I do remember how he acted and what Trump said. “it will just go away. You could inject a houshold cleaner to clear your lungs”.
The border
Trump and Biden: Trump tried to build a wall taking $3 billion from the military budget which was appropriated for improving the the housing for military families. Biden waited until it was too late and had to issue an executive order.
Social Security
Both candidates erred on Social Security, with Biden incorrectly saying that Trump “wants to get rid” of the program, and Trump falsely alleging that Biden will “wipe out” Social Security due to the influx of people at the border.
Given this scenario who could you vote for? VP Harris now seems to be the “ONLY” probable candidate. She knew of such.
https://www.factcheck.org/2024/06/factchecking-the-biden-trump-debate/
https://www.forbes.com/sites/davidmarkowitz/2021/04/30/who-lied-more-during-their-first-100-days-biden-trump-or-obama/
Donald Trump debating Kamala Harris.
I repeat:
Donald Trump debating Kamala Harris.
Sacre Bleu!!
Debates are about the dumbest inventions ever. They explicate nothing of substance. A poll taken of the Nixon/Kennedy debate on radio gave the majority approval winning the debate to Nixon; those watching on TV gave the majority approval to Kennedy. Says an awful lot about appearances over substance. And, besides, any debate conducted by the Big Media is totally biased. Lastly, voting in this country has been debased by a. Early voting; b. Voting by mail; c. Allowing illegals to vote; d. Not requiring a photo id to vote e. Allowing the dead to cast a ballot.
I agree, Statesmen should not be reduced to showmen.
But better than a duel?
I submit to you, that for all the reason you cited, and the vast amount of people dependent upon the federal government for significant and conspicuous benefits, some in the projects, some on Main Street, some on K Street and Wall Street-all elections are rigged.
Mencken may have been a cynical nihilist; but that dim view of life made him a rather perspicuous expositor of government. His quip about ever election neing an auction in advance of stolen goods seems to have aged well.
I must disagree – the Biden-Trump debate showed the whole world what has been obvious for a few years now but the democrats were trying to hide it – Joe Biden is in advanced cognitive decline and it will not get better – it will only get worse.
I find the fact that he is the President and that Kamala Harris stands in the doorway waiting for the sign frightening.
Pray for our country
The puppet just happened to drop out on National Ice Cream Day. You can’t make this stuff up.
I remember the “what is the ice cream flavor” questions from the press early on – really digging deep
Now if we can only get Pope Francis to resign!
The tables are turned. Now it’s Trump who is too old to be POTUS.
It’s not a question of numerical age. Biden has senile dementia, Trump does not.
I liked how Trump remembered and brought that union guy up on stage in Grand Rapids. This EV thing will help him in MI, I believe.
Organized abortion in the US is the murder of American children killing the Union. Legalized abortion at any stage in pregnancy, is, lying about it using corrupted law.
Now we are in the present looking at the future. Whether or not he gets elected, Trump has taken his place, his turn, managing the baby killing. And telling lies. Later he might want to be the “hero who moderately came back in pro-life” and brought others along too; when everything else will supposed to have been water under the bridge.
I think that Trump will still win, but Harris will be more competitive. Look for Trump to win, but by a smaller margin. Interestingly, Trump is now the “old one.”
He’ll have to get up at the debate and say” I will not use my opponent’s youth and inexperience…” (who already used that line in another debate?)
The tables are turned. Now it’s Trump who’s too old to be POTUS.
Listen up Democrats! Forget the President like he has forgotten you. It’s over. Put on your masks, take another vaccine and get behind Harris! Stop acting like you voted for someone else! Honestly, enough! The big donors amd media have spoken. Please do what you are told – it’s for your own good.
Athanasius: Your 3:12 a.m. – “You can’t make this stuff up.”
Sorry, but I gotta disagree – and it’s gonna get worse.
BTW – my favorite Ice Cream is vanilla w/specks and just a tad of maple syrup.
Yummm!!
Yes, that’s my fear, but I will try to remain hopeful. Maybe we can all go where we haven’t been unburdened by what has been 🙄.
Even though it sounds benign, vanity for the new is the definition of evil.
Try sprinkling a few salted peanuts on that vanilla ice cream & maple syrup Mr. Terrence. (It’s good with cane syrup, too.)
Will do
Russel. Trump may still convince his MAGA bunch that he is mentally sound. We can’t forget the sinking electric boat and the shark at a campaign stop in Detroit. He could not remember his WH doctor’s name. Randy Johnson in stead of Ronnie Jackson. More importantly, he lied profusly.
Some Factchecks:
Immigration
Immigrants are “coming from prisons, they’re coming from jails, they’re coming from mental institutions and insane asylums.” False!
The jobs that are created under Biden, “107 percent of those jobs are taken by illegal aliens.” Mostly false.
Economy
During my presidency, we had “the best economy in the history of our country, in the history of the world … We had no inflation, soaring incomes.”
False.
Crime
“Our crime rate is going up.” Mostly False. Violent crimes are down markedly.
Taxes, Social Security and Medicare
The Biden administration is “the only administration that said we’re going to raise your taxes by four times what you’re paying now.”
False.
Electric vehicles
Trump: “They spent $9 billion on eight chargers.”
False. “drill baby, drill”.
He is truly unfit for office. Just ask our Catholic clergy!!
With the belated announcement that Kamala Harris will be the new candidate, our options are few.
God save the union.
Sorry for my misspelling, Russell.
Your choice of facts about DT is very selective. Trump reversed Roe V Wade. How many thousands of children are alive because of him. Compare with lying Joe and his partial birth abortion position. Biden is a congenital liar! Jan. 6 Trump did not try to control the military or the communication system both necessary for a coup. From his first day of Presidency he was accused of being a Russia spy. False of course AND WHAT A LIE! They have tried to murder him. Does not count I guess. Stop watching MSNBC and CNN. You will think more clearly
Even though it sounds benign, vanity for the new is the definition of evil.
I don’t think Kamala Harris will beat Donald Trump–unless Christians throw away their votes for an unknown “Christan Candidate” who has no chance of winning. VP Harris has no record of accomplishments, and her main platform seems to be greater abortion availability on the taxpayers’ dime. She is making a big deal out of being black, even though she is also half Indian (her mom is from India). NBC News (secular news) this morning (7/22) included a discussion of her failure to accomplish anything when she was assigned to do something about the massive influx of immigrants flooding the southern border. There’s really nothing that VP Harris can take credit for during her tenure as VP other than really pushing hard for abortion and LGBTQ+ rights. She has no notable accomplishments as a Senator and only served a very short term before Pres. Biden selected her for his running mate. She was an Attorney General in California and had some accomplishments that would be acceptable to many Christians. I know a lot of Christians are mad at Pres. Trump for what they called backsliding on the abortion issue (he has stated that abortion should be legal for rape, incest, and to save the life of the mother), and they disapprove of his past affairs with women, but to reject him for this and throw away the vote for some 3rd party candidate who will be lucky to get a few thousand votes–that’s just foolishness, especially when Pres. Trump has shown himself to be a good father by raising several respectable and accomplished children. As for his sexual sins–all we know is what his enemies and the media have told us. I personally think that Pres. Biden’s and VP Harris’ sins of calling for virtually-unrestricted abortion rights are much greater than “fooling around.” Don’t be a dreamer–be wise when you vote this November. And remember to vote for local and state candidates who will be friendly towards the life issues.
Now that Biden is out of the race, Americans can now rightly focus on Trump’s equally problematic age given the state of his mental health (bizarrely talking about sharks, electrocution, or Hannibal Lecter) which many simply did not give attention to earlier. No wonder some of Trump’s sychopants now want Biden to stay on the ballot.
For all Trump’s and Biden’s gaffes, Trump has so far not lost his mental ability to logically sequence. So far, at least, Trump’s talk about sharks has not led to an auntie killing; recall Joe claiming to have killed Medicare. Neither has Trump yet claimed that a cannibal has eaten a relative.
Biden’s “age” was raised by many as a POLITE and civil and decent way of saying Biden had lost his ability to parse an idea out of his addled brain and into his mouth, tongue, and lips in order to communicate a basic sensible thought.
Mrs. Whitlock above – Yes, how is Kamala Harris Black? I’d say she’s half-Black or of mixed race (ditto Obama, BTW). This seems to me to be a throwback to “the bad old days” when a person who had six drops- or was it sixteen? – of Black blood was considered Coloured or Negro or whatever the word was back then. I find it rather tiresome, maybe racist even.
Cleo;
I remember when she dropped out of the presidential race in 2020 – one of the things she said was “America is not ready for a woman of color to be president”. That was the first time I knew that she was a ‘woman of color’ – when she played the race/gender guilt card.
There was a movie about 25-26 years back entitled ‘The American President’. The part was played by Michael Douglas and at the end he gave a speech in which he intoned the phrase “We have serious problems and we need serious people to solve them” – he said it twice.
There is a recent video with Michael Douglas saying that he strongly believes that Joe Biden is fully capable and “all there” as the saying goes.
There are multiple videos of Kamala Harris laughing in her unique way.
I think the old rule was “one drop” and that really applied more in Anglo society.
Mrs. Harris has ancestry from at least 3 continents.
Many of us in the US & former colonies have a similar complex ancestry but can fly under the radar more easily than Kamala Harris can.
Democrats across the country whose right to vote in primary elections has essentially been taken from them should be incensed at this turn of events. This isn’t something that just happened– anyone could have seen it coming, and one can only wonder if the whole process has been orchestrated by party bosses– or who knows who else? The only thing that would have been more obvious would have been if Biden had actually run, been re-elected, and resigned a month or two after his inauguration. I’ve been saying that this was a massive game of chicken, and the Democrats finally blinked.
What’s circulating on X -:
“Adam Parkhomenko on X: Biden calls into campaign HG”
https://x.com/AdamParkhomenko/status/1815506424094462027
Said to be the real thing.
There are other slices of the event, posted on YOUTUBE, with VP Harris, etc.
Trump will likely win in November and occupy the White House in January. That said, he will be facing some serious problems, such Hamas in Gaza, Russia in Ukraine, and of course China. Trump will be Commander-in-Chief and in charge. He will not be able to blame other people for things going wrong. Blaming Biden will not suffice as an excuse.
All the bombastic horse manure he shovels will not solve any real problems. It might impress the rubes in Alabama, but it will not impress the Chinese who are smart and tough. Time to get serious and knock off the bombastic rhetoric and get to work.
Were you unconscious during the Trump administration? He NEVER blamed anyone else for the decisions he needed to make. One of my favorite Trump moments was when he sent our bombers to destroy the Syrian air force after they had gassed to death their own Kurdish citizens. Nor did he ever shy away from controversy, as when he told critics to take a hike and FINALLY moved the US embassy to Jerusalem. As for his bombastic style, I dont mind it. He was forced to deal with dictators and thugs on the world stage and toughness is something they both respect and fear.Do you think they didnt notice he took a shot to the head and rose up to tell his voters to “Fight”??? Let me tell you, they NOTICED. The US is not Switzerland, you know? Better someone bombastic who can take care of business than someone who is senile, or an idiot. For me , I will vote for someone who is strong and unafraid and puts America first. A president who acts like Miss Manners I can live without. Trump in 2024!
The Swiss may practice neutrality but they’re not pacifists.
I agree though that President Trump knows how to deal with unpleasant people and he does that without starting wars.
You seem to think that Trump is some junior varsity messiah, keep drinking the Kool Aid.
More tax cuts for the rich. That’s the real deal. I personally may benefit from him, as my portfolio may increase. But I do not support him.