His.

We are made by God. On a good day, most of us admit that. On a really good day, even those lacking faith acknowledge that. But even on our best day, so many of us reject the related truth: it’s not just that we’re made by God, we’re made for God.

Of course, we know this theme reverberates throughout the Old Testament and continues in the New. Freed from slavery, God’s people showed little thanks and offered no humble acceptance of His plan for them. A Golden calf in Exodus. A refusal to enter the land in Deuteronomy. The people of Judah wanted to go their own way. Numbers tells us that even Moses himself went rogue with a strike of the rock. And while Colossians 1:16 reminds us that “all things have been made through Him and for Him,” the New Testament also gives us the rich young man and the prodigal son.

The truth: Our lives are for Him. We are His.

Our mistake: Our lives are for us. We are what we say we are. We do as we like. The way we want.

Recently, a friend was in the midst of a busy college search for his middle daughter. In the company of a small gathering of fellow dads, he shared his disbelief over the number of college admissions staff proclaiming their pronouns. Everywhere he looked and turned: he/him/his, she/her/hers, they/them/theirs. LinkedIn profiles. Email signatures. Declared during campus visits.

My friend and his wife found the practice remarkably strange. On the one hand, they felt some mild relief that at least most of the people they encountered solved the puzzle correctly. But neither he nor his wife thought that knowing one’s chromosomes seemed worthy of showcasing. They wondered: could it be that schools had so lost their minds that they believed a high percentage of moms and dads with high school-aged children would be attracted to institutions which presented incorrect answers?

My friend regretted to report that this practice wasn’t just widespread at those secular schools with safe spaces and healing circles on the campus quad. A shocking number of “Catholic” universities were jumping on board. One of the wives present said she had seen the same thing. Another parent concurred.

In each case, these moms and dads reached the same conclusion: the world had gone crazy. Academe had gone still crazier. But, with some firmness, each declared: when it came to considering a Catholic university, pronouning was a deal-breaker.

Their reasoning was straightforward: those proclaiming their pronouns weren’t just wayward tenured faculty members blessed with lifetime employment. These were staff members – probably many of them recently hired – in the admissions office. And, if this was the messaging these Catholic colleges were freely choosing to send to their frontlines – to their most forward-facing seat of the institution’s revenue-generating sales arm – there was no way any of these three families were going to spend the $50K+ per year to send their children there.

The marketer in me understood: the value calculation – that give/get ratio – wasn’t adding up for them. These Catholic families had to “give” too much for the get in question. And it wasn’t just the high cost of tuition: “For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul?” (Mt 16:26).

And, as one dad joked, “These schools weren’t even Ivies!” It reminded me of Sir Thomas More’s famous line from A Man for All Seasons: “…but for Wales?”

That was it – pronouning also revealed that the “get” wasn’t there. Despite a website and glossy marketing materials, the things traditionally associated with a Catholic education wouldn’t be found at a place that got something so fundamental wrong. A rigorous curriculum steeped in faith and reason, a pursuit of truth motivated by the understanding that we are each created by God, in His image for His purpose – a college’s embrace of pronouning betrayed all of that.

One of the dads marveled at the juxtaposition. Catholic high schools around the country were experiencing a renaissance because they were a refuge amidst the nation’s insanity. Catholic and non-Catholic families were flocking to them to keep their children away from the indoctrination found everywhere else.

He wondered aloud: “Why hasn’t Catholic higher ed picked up on this? Who runs these universities?”

I took a long sip of my beer and furtively stared at the floor. Pronouning had exploded on my own campus. All I could do was shrug.

Underlying our pronouning moment is an often-overlooked point: we seem to have arrived at a time when many people believe nothing is real until they themselves say it is.

Take Kamala Harris, who – speaking at an event this past summer – introduced herself this way: “I am Kamala Harris. My pronouns are she and her and I am a woman sitting at the table wearing a blue suit.”

In today’s culture, speech births reality. Which is why the left is trying so hard to manipulate and control it.

Of course, Catholics know that while our speech is important for reflecting the truth, it does not create truth. And so, anyone remotely familiar with Catholic teaching would realize the practice of pronouning is incompatible with it. Even those not especially versed in Catholic teaching but who possess some understanding of the broader lexicon of Judeo-Christianity would recognize that pronouning is completely foreign to it.

Putting it simply: if we are made both by God and for God and God doesn’t make mistakes (He only makes human beings who themselves can and often do make mistakes), the notion that people determine their gender and choose their pronouns is ridiculous.

The ultimate my will over Thy will.

None of this is good – for anyone involved. And regardless of what academe, corporations, the media and misdirected marketers would have us believe, this practice is not consonant with real love or real compassion – in fact, it’s quite the opposite. But in the thinking-challenged times that we seem to live in, some very well-intentioned people may have been swept into this wave.

While that is sad, it is never hopeless. Friends of all faiths – those of free will but of goodwill – can reconsider what they are doing. And Catholics can pray about it. Remember: God’s grace is ever present, ready to forgive, merciful and loving. But it’s ours, only if we choose it.

As for me, I know these words don’t need to be written to make them true. But I write them anyway – not because they need to be written – but perhaps because they need to be read.

I am his because I am His.